Since I started taking classes again, the absolute bane of
my existence has been the APA citations.
Bane is too tepid. To say that
they have become a personal hell would be more accurate.
My current professor, a well-credentialed being whose face I
only know from his online photograph stated in the syllabus, “Significant
points will be subtracted if APA guidelines are not followed.” This is true.
I forgot a period and five points were taken off. I won’t deny that this conjured up thoughts
about the anal stage and the psychos that that thought up the APA format. As a result, I am often up until the wee hours
trying to get the citations right.
Given that I have a job, these late hours present a challenge. This means stumbling out of bed, an illegal
amount of caffeine, and feeling one’s way to the closet with hands thrust
forward as if seeking Braille. This, in order to find something remotely
professional to wear to the office while in a bleary, citation wearied state.
Beige pants are the answer to the question. These are the
khakis of the work world. Find the pants
then add a white shirt, a scarf, and loafers. Ready, set, go!
This week as I pawed in the closet I was reminded of the
Katharine Hepburn clothing exhibit that I saw at the Connecticut Historical
Society with friends in the summer.
Upon walking in there were several pairs of her beige pants
on display. Being a fan of the pants –
as well as the star, I stopped to admire them.
A docent sidled up and confided that she had been “her
sister’s best friend.”
“How wonderful,” I responded in a rather bemused fashion,
hoping that the woman would go away but she was only prompted her to share
more.
“Yes,” she nodded knowingly towards the pants. “Kate had over 50 pairs and she had a 19 inch
waist her entire life.”
The thought of 50 pairs of interchangeable beige pants was intriguing
but the lifetime waist size of 19 inches a bit unbelievable.
Despite this, I still am thankful for my beige pants.
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