Friday, October 3, 2014

Bleary Eyed and Beige Pants

Since I started taking classes again, the absolute bane of my existence has been the APA citations.  Bane is too tepid.  To say that they have become a personal hell would be more accurate. 

My current professor, a well-credentialed being whose face I only know from his online photograph stated in the syllabus, “Significant points will be subtracted if APA guidelines are not followed.”  This is true.  I forgot a period and five points were taken off.   I won’t deny that this conjured up thoughts about the anal stage and the psychos that that thought up the APA format.  As a result, I am often up until the wee hours trying to get the citations right.

Given that I have a job, these late hours present a challenge.  This means stumbling out of bed, an illegal amount of caffeine, and feeling one’s way to the closet with hands thrust forward as if seeking Braille. This, in order to find something remotely professional to wear to the office while in a bleary, citation wearied state.

Beige pants are the answer to the question. These are the khakis of the work world.  Find the pants then add a white shirt, a scarf, and loafers.  Ready, set, go!

This week as I pawed in the closet I was reminded of the Katharine Hepburn clothing exhibit that I saw at the Connecticut Historical Society with friends in the summer. 

Upon walking in there were several pairs of her beige pants on display.  Being a fan of the pants – as well as the star, I stopped to admire them.

A docent sidled up and confided that she had been “her sister’s best friend.”

“How wonderful,” I responded in a rather bemused fashion, hoping that the woman would go away but she was only prompted her to share more.

“Yes,” she nodded knowingly towards the pants.  “Kate had over 50 pairs and she had a 19 inch waist her entire life.”

The thought of 50 pairs of interchangeable beige pants was intriguing but the lifetime  waist size of 19 inches a bit unbelievable.
Despite this, I still am thankful for my beige pants.

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